Being Nice · Friendship · Relationships · Self-Recognition and Admiration · Sex

Whorish Tendencies

Okay. Here’s the deal. We have all had that one person, right? The words don’t accurately express the definition of the relationship in its entirety.

Obsession. Infatuation. Boredom compelled lust.

An uneducated and ill-versed individual would perhaps use the term “love”. However, the person who uses this term is a fucking idiot.

The point of this annoying-as-fuck blog post is to point out how ridiculous human beings are on emotional, sentimental levels.

We cling to a person who makes us feel good. We may use another person to “make us feel good” … know what I’m saying?
Let me break it down for you in the simplest way possible.
Being in a comfortable relationship and having sexual contentment are two entirely different issues.

It would stand that two issues could be in need of two very different individuals.

You could juggle a spouse and a side chick/dick.
But society tends to frown on this way of living… And hold the phone! Let me just rant about how fucking STUPID that is.

1.)  Having more than one partner is a sin. Oh, SHUT THE FUCK UP already. Bitch! You sin everyday. In fact, the list of reasons your make believe daddy in the sky is going to send you to hell, is always accruing time and reasons. Kind of like interest on a car loan. You only live once… I don’t know why you wouldn’t want to get laid. Fucking freak.

2.) But I don’t believe in God. I think it’s just morally wrong. You know what’s morally wrong? Your fucking face! If you understood the principles of ethics at all, you wouldn’t say things like, “OMG Janet, that is like, sooooo morally wrong.”
Let me tell you something. Remember that time you watched Magic Mike and your lady bits tingled a bit? Outside of your relationship! *gasp* You are fucking morally deranged, yo.

(Just because you don’t act on it, doesn’t mean it isn’t all over your Medulla Oblongata.)

3.) Why would you cheat? Why not just leave your Significant other? Listen Linda, have you not heard the words I’ve been saying? I’m fucking comfortable. However, “comfortable” doesn’t really take the edge off my horny, know what I’m saying?

4.) Well you sound like a whore. Ehhh… you say tomayto, I say tomahto. I’m sorry that you aren’t comfortable with your sexuality. I know when I’m 50 I’m gonna have no ragrats for all the flavors I’ve tried. Meanwhile, you’ve been sipping on the same cruelty free, BPA free, natural, all-organic bottle of coconut water since 2007. Get the fuck outta here.

Annnnnnd, let’s face it. If its all up in your Medulla Oblongata already, then you might as well act on it. Live it up a little.
Get yo freak on.
YOLO.

Since you’re still reading this so far… let me give you a little something…

PRO-TIP: Leave the obsession and infatuation in the dust. Fuel yourself on that lust compelled through boredom. In the end, it makes it easier to enjoy yourself.

Or just be a prudent pile of no fun like Linda over there… but, if you choose that route;
You can’t sit with us.

Related image

 

 

 

 

Friendship · Relationships

Lovers And Friends

Isn’t it strange how the human mind can filter emotion? Most people who know you think they know exactly who you are, but there is always that one thing you never let people in on. Even your most loved ones will never fully know the true you. They may think they do, but the don’t. Not completely, any ways.

We sit and we put our hearts and souls into our relationships. We try hard and then we get comments from our friends like, “well I really love my significant other” or “If you don’t love him, why aren’t you leaving him?”

They don’t see the ugly tears you shed on a daily basis. They don’t hear the silence you endure in the evenings. They don’t know how much you love and admire this person because you don’t open up about it. If you did open up, there would be an endless banter of how you can fix it followed up with the notoriously biased,  “but, seriously, why would you want to?

“He doesn’t support your hopes and dreams, so why would you stay with him?”
“You guys are terrible for each other”.
and then the dreaded….
“I can’t stand him”.

Good for you, friend. Let me tell you… I CAN stand him. In fact, I fucking love him. And being happy and feeling loved are two entirely different plays on the field of love. You didn’t love him through the worst and the best. You didn’t carry his babies, cry on his shoulder, or watch him drift away.
He didn’t cheat on you, and in return you didn’t cheat on him.
You didn’t work through what we have worked through so far, so why is there a need to be passive aggressive?

Friend, I love you unconditionally. As I do all my friends. Sure, you annoy me with the shitty decisions you make sometimes or the crappy remarks you make, and yep, I vent about you to my other friends; but at the end of the day, I still love you unconditionally.
I don’t like very many of your friends, and quite honestly, some of the people you love? Yeah, I can’t stand them. But I won’t say it, because I respect who you are and what you choose to do.

Want to cheat? I’ll be here to support whatever the outcome is.
You want to leave your boyfriend? I’ll stand next to you on the days you miss him the most.
I might say, “I told you so”, but I’ll wrap my love around you and make sure you are okay.

Finding someone who loves you unconditionally is a rarity. There are days I wonder if anyone does. So, I speak about my life in a flippant way. I may even say some borderline bad things, (let’s admit, there may be a good reason people side eye him, and if I didn’t side eye him a little too, there would be some judgement on my character as well), but deep down inside I love my person as much as you love your people.

I get a little crazy. I obsess over a favorite of mine, and I know, that looks insane. But, if I don’t focus on something… anything… I go crazy. My mind wanders and I’m the only person in a room full of people. I’m alone, desolate, and I have lost the foundation to my life.

Please know, that just because your friend seems happy all the time (and a little crazy too), there’s more going on and maybe it’s a front. A cover-up. A show. Maybe it is who she is? Do you even know her really?

I don’t think you do.
Do not pass go, and do not collect $200.

Matter fact, Game Over.
Insert 2 tokens to continue.